Here comes the poor-me-ego-old behavior talk: Just because I’m sitting here typing doesn’t mean I’m actually writing or working on my next memoir project. I’m on vacation and I haven’t taken some time for myself or creativity. Here is the here and now positive talk. I’m so grateful to visit with my family and I love them dearly. I am aware that I’m in a of a panic where I feel like I’m missing something, like I’m going in circles not getting any where and the only place that grounds me is here. So here I am, on the page typing away and I already feel at ease.
There is a transformation occurring. I’ve actually been going through a metamorphosis for quite some time. Creativity is not stagnate, it’s always flowing, therefore that is what I feel, creativity flowing through my blood, feeding every part of my being. I can heard the blood pumping like tapping on the keys of my laptop, whispering, this is meant to be.
Art is not linear. Neither is the artist’s life, but we forget that. We try to “plan” our life and “plan” our career – as if we could. We also try to plan our growth. This means transformation catches us by surprise. . . .It is a spiritual law that when we are ready to transform, transformation will come to us. We are all conduits for a great creative energy that seeks expression in us and through us. When we yearn to be different, it is not just our restless ego. It is our accurate response to the creative energy within us that is seeking a new venue for expression. We are all creative and we are, in turn, creations. Just as we get restless to make something new, so, too, our creator maybe be restless to make something new from us. ~ Julia Cameron
Just as we get restless to make something new, so, too our creator maybe restless to make something new from us. That rings so true for me. I might have a bit of panic about not writing these past few days, but something else is brewing within me. I can feel it, it’s right there on the tip of my tongue ready to be written. Don’t you just love that feeling?
If you are panicked, tell yourself, “Ah! Good sign: I am getting unstuck.” It is spiritual law that we are in the process of becoming what we already are – perfect creations of a perfect creator. This meant that at our most awkward and ill at ease, we are still in divine order and moving ever closer to the creator’s intention. Faith in this process, a belief that we can change and still experience the unchanging support of the universe, is critical to any sense of comfort as we grow. ~ Julia Cameron
I know this flutter of energy is part of the process and as long as I’m here on the page, I am getting closer to the truth. The true self.
Until next time, keep on typing. . . .