Why do I write? The question may be, why don’t I write? I have been writing since I can remember. There comes a point where I need to take more risks with my writing life. Not just on the page but my whole writing life. Am I really living the creative life I proclaim? I would love to say, ‘Yes! 100% you betcha!’ but in reality, I am not. Sadly, my routine has hit a roadblock and I am the only one who can get over the hump. So why am I here now, on the page, sharing with you? Because I like to share my journey with you. Maybe I have done or gone through something that will help you with your writing life. Now, it’s time for me to start sharing a bit more of my writing. More so, parts of my memoir about working for a luxury hotel in the heart of the Canadian Rockies.
I have been sharing a bit of Dani Shapiro’s, Still Writing, and I recently opened the book this week to find part of a paragraph underlined. I do this with all my reference books, I underline and tab to make sure I have easy access to the ‘a-ha’ moment I knew I would need at a later date.
I am compelled to take risks. Because there’s no point, really, in spending one’s life alone in a room, out of rhythm with the rest of humanity, unless the stakes are high. ~ Dani Shaprio
Something struck me about this quote. I am taking a risk to. To be here and share with you. Are you reading or just glimpsing? Are you engaged with my stories or am I just writing for the sake of writing? I am taking a risk for being honest to reveal what is in my darkest closets. The other night my partner and I were playing cards and I was thinking of my hotel memoir and the amount of work I still have to do on shaping the manuscript. A few moments must have passed by when my partner said, ‘having trouble finding what you’re looking for?’ knowing I was thinking. ‘No, just moving the many filing cabinets in my mind to organize my writing day tomorrow.’ His response was to be funny and I laughed but he was right, ‘I would think you have layers upon layers of cabinets and those layers have layers and layers.’ Yes, he is right. As a memoirst, I have a spiral staircase of filing cabinets, wooden boxes, and shelves of moments that shape who I am.
Courage is all about feeling the fear and doing it anyway. ~ Dani Shaprio
I am taking a risk by opening one of those many cabinets to let out the stories and experiences that have been filed away for another time. By taking that risk, I am willing and have the nerve to write about the life I have had the nerve to live. It is scary as hell. The ego is ready to run in the opposite direction. The fearful questions start to rattle around my mind, ‘What if I embarrass myself? What if my family disown’s me? What if I get sued? What if everyone I know finds out about that time I once did that thing?’ Yikes! Then I take a breath…
What if I don’t take the risk? That would be worse than not writing. I am taking a leap of faith of sharing my experiences of a life I never saw myself living. A career I didn’t think I would take on after my first summer working for a luxury hotel in the heart of the Canadian Rockies. A world that is not for everyone. The hotel world. A world where high expectations are eaten for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. A world where living with the same people you work with day in and day out is considered normal. A world where we woke up to the beautiful Victoria Glacier each morning and watched cotton candy pink sunsets each summer night and took for granted. A world where guests could tell you anything and you kept their secrets to yourself as much as you held yours even closer. It’s time to let go and share.
Until Next Time, Keeping on Typing…