It’s that time of year when everyone is running around trying to get ready for Christmas. We are no strangers to this behavior in our home, especially when we live across the country from our families. This year we were ahead of the game so to speak. I bought Christmas gifts in the summer so I wouldn’t be stressing out over when we would put the parcels in the mail and if they would make it to Ontario, New Brunswick and Nova Scotia before Christmas; it’s important that our nephew receives his gift on Christmas, he helps me focus on time management. I wouldn’t be very happy if I received a gift after Christmas if I was three or four. I think this is the first time in over ten years that we haven’t been scrambling and paying $30+ for express postage to make sure our families had their gifts before Christmas.
We hosted our first official Christmas gathering last night, the “East Coast Kitchen Christmas party”, it was fun! A lot of people, food and Christmas Cheer! We were well prepared for this little event, we even bought appetizers almost a month in advance because I didn’t want to buy everything at once and gasp at a bill over a hundred dollars and regret spending money on a party that I know wish I could cancel. (That’s the ego talking.) Being prepared makes it much easier to deal with the situation(s). Being prepared makes me less stressed out, even though I practice mediation, I still have moments where I feel panicked over the little things that really don’t matter.
Even though I was well-organized for our families Christmas gifts and our kitchen party, I however am not ready for Christmas in our home. I have a few gifts for my partner (he claims he is done) but I haven’t gotten any of our dinner menu items, or that one gift I really want to give to my partner. So I’ll be venturing out this afternoon to run a few errands. I have to remind myself to take a deep breath and practice patience when it comes to the holiday crunch.
The other thing I did as an early Christmas gift to myself, more like practicing what I preach, is to share my work; Last week I shared this website/blog on my Facebook page. I was struggling with sharing this site, because of the ego and it’s old behavioral thoughts of thinking “Oh, what are people going to think? Who do you think you are trying to share your work when you can’t even finish this novel you’ve been working forrrrrrr-evvvvvver.” I hear the long drawn forever echoing in my mind because the ego sometimes sneaks and it’s like I forget how to meditate or deal with the negative talk, but I choose to say “go away ego, you’re not in charge anymore, time to go.” My theme for the past few weeks has been “you have to let go to grow.” Which means let go of the old behaviors so I can grow as the loving person I am. I sometimes see the ego as a large crippling hand, with long bony fingers with dark long pointy finger nails like talons grabbing around me so that I can not move, can not breathe. I take a deep breath and tell myself this is only a thought and I can breath again.
I hit post on Facebook introducing this site and part of me (the ego) is filled with fear wondering what people are thinking. The other part of me (the true self) is okay, this is what I’ve wanted to do, I’ve wanted to share my work and I have, I am and this is part of letting go to grow. This makes me happy. This is what we need to do for ourselves, to honor what we love to do and who we are. Spend as much time with your passion as possible, give it love, give it life, give it a voice and live every day with purpose and intention! What is your passion? What do you do to stay on track with your life’s purpose? Love to hear from you.
Until next time my friends, Merry Christmas and keep on typing….