How Creativity Continues To Save Me

writer-fff

I’m reading a few creative and self-awareness books at the moment. The creativity, my creativity is calling out, reaching out to be heard, so much that I can not ignore it for a minute. This is not a bad thing at all. I love that the creativity within me wants out to be heard, to be shares, just to be.

The Right to Write, and The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron,  are wonderful books of awaking the creative spirit, to remind us that we have the right to write.  Writing is a friend whose shoulder we can cry on. Writing is a confidant who listens and lets us sort things. Writing is a comrade, marching with us through he steep days of sorrow and despair. Writing is our weather and also how we change our weather. Writing is our landscape and how we view the landscape that we have.  All I have to say is Exactly!

Writing is my friend, someone I trust to hear the words I put down on the page that I can not utter to anyone but the blank page. No judgement, just words of joy, fear, anger, love, frustration, despair, pure awareness on the page. So much can be given to the page and that’s what I crave to do. I put down words that I can not utter to myself in my morning pages – a practice that comes from Julia Cameron’s, The Artist’s Way – three long hand pages of streamed consciousness, but if you have nothing to say, you can write “I have nothing to say” over and over again, but I can tell you that once you start to write “I have nothing to say” something else shows itself.

I once started to write about how much I felt stuck in my job. Even though I thought I loved the concept of my job, like a lover, it was the thrill of something new. I was chosen to run a resort, just me because of my experience, because of who I was, because what I was able to bring to the business, but I knew deep down it was only part of the journey of what was already determined to be my life. A story-teller, to share my experiences to heal not only myself but to heal others who could not express what they wanted to express. I was willing to accept this truth and after three months of writing about how I needed to leave the resort in my morning pages, I did exactly what I intended. I was laid off from my job and I moved my partner and I to an apartment along the ocean and I wrote the first draft of my memoir and my journey as a creative being continued.

Let’s back up a little. How did I learn about morning pages and Julia Cameron? From a friend who I met at the resort I managed. If I didn’t accept the job at the resort I would have not met my friend who would have lent me a copy of The Artist’s Way that sat on my desk for weeks until one morning I took the book to the gym and started to read it as I climbed on the stairmaster. I was hooked instantly. Serendipity is an amazing energy! Thank you!

seredipity

Art is a spiritual transaction. Artists are visionaries. We routinely practice a form of faith, seeing clearly and moving toward a creative goal that shimmers in the distance – often visible to use, but invisible to those around us…Art is an act of faith, and we practice practicing it…

I was committed to The Artist’s Way – it changed my life as a writer, I have gone through the workbook twice now and for over six years now I have been doing morning pages. At first I was resistant, I would get up go work out and then write the morning pages, but something wasn’t right – so I let go of my routine and I woke up at least a half hour earlier than I normally would to write the morning pages and then start my day. When I changed this part of my routine it changed me, it shifted what I knew had to be shifted but was unwilling to say it out loud, but on the page it was very clear. “Something has to change, I can’t pretend that I’m happy even if I am a manager of a mediation resort, hello!” From my morning pages in 2010 – I ended up leaving my job shortly there after.

Now four years later, I gain comfort from Julia Cameron’s creativity awakening books. She has led me to other authors who share the same consciousness, to share creativity, to unleash it from within. Don’t hold back what is so natural for you, what you have been called to do, what you know is true.

I am now working on one of the Initiation Tool’s from The Right To Write, I have to list three creative monsters, the people who have been for me creative monsters, people who have criticized, undercut or sabotaged my creativity. I  have a  funny feeling one of those monsters is my ego. The voice that has so much doubt that I have to yell at it and say “No! You don’t get a say here, I am a writer and a good person so mess off!”

Monsters

Thank you to my cousin for sharing this great image about creative monsters.

I am able to watch the self-doubt monster try to come in swiftly by the way I get tired and don’t want to write anymore. I will begin to procrastinate, watch TV, start a movie, have a snack and if I have the urge to vacuum I know the monster has taken over. I am truly grateful to be aware of my thoughts and my body and yes I do give into the vacuum at times, and I’d like to think that my monster and I have a give and take relationship. Once I finish with the vacuum, I say “okay, that’s enough of that, it’s time to get back to the writing.” Then I am able to sit down and be with the writing. I am truly grateful to be aware.

writer

If you have a chance to pick up a copy of The Artist’s Way I would highly recommend it to you. I would also be happy to help you go through the book, I love the process and the little reminders of how to awaken the creativity.

 Until next time….keep on writing…

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s