I’m patiently waiting for my favorite table to become available at Serious coffee, there’s something about being in the corner of a coffee shop that gets me excited and I seem to write a little more. At the moment there is someone else sitting in the corner mysteriously writing away; what are they working on, where are they going, who are they? My people watching kicks in and I am wondering what people are doing this morning, are they writing their life stories or just beginning their day with a cup of coffee? The imagination is getting warmed up, ready to write.
I’ve had a bit of a writers U-turn or relapse of some kind. I can’t seem to get back into my original memoir that started off being about my maternal grandparents and has evolved into more about me and growing up in Nova Scotia; along with the drama that I put up with my family and the drama that I put myself through before I left for Alberta. Since the playwright workshop something was turned on and then something else was turned off to maintain balance. If I’m going to be true to my passion, I have to let go of the fear that someone is going to read what I’ve written and not like it, and that has happened on two occasions and each time I’ve shut down for a few weeks, months and the first time it happened, I didn’t write for over a year and that was not a good year. This time I haven’t stopped writing, just not as much as I like, and I’m cautious of what I admit to myself on the page which is not good either, so something has to change.
I’m patiently waiting for my true self to kick the ego in the ass. I am so aware it’s the ego that is holding onto the fear and there is more fear that I see building up. I have to find the strength to say “Stop” and knock it down and move forward. I’m reading escaping into the open, by Elizabeth Berg and she has pushed me forward with writing for fun to spark the writer within…again. I’ve answered the call to write, I love stories and sharing stories, like I mentioned, something has been turned on since the playwright workshop and I honestly don’t want to turn it off.
Thank you for being here with me during this time. Are you experiencing a similar relapse of some sort? What are you doing to move forward? I’d love to hear from you.
Until next time, keep on typing…..